Duh, Santa is real

Duh, Santa is Real.
Staying with my grandmother during the winter meant long and dreadful hours at a doctor’s office, great food and making dozens of lists for Santa until I finally settled on the best one–the one with the most toys. Fortunately, although back then I might’ve thought of it as punishment rested upon me by God, I was not alone through these times, my brother, Alex, whose dream at the time was to be an astronaut, was with me. That winter, Alex was not as
enthusiastic about his list as I was about mine, and it wasn’t his loss of interest in the list that irritated me at the time, but rather his investment in my disinvestment of the list. When he said “Santa is not going to read your list, he’s not real” in a mocking tone for the third time that day I
launched onto him, and as a result was put on time out for, what felt like, hours.

Later, after lunch, when he told me “You should see this,” all I could think about, as I followed him into grandma’s closet, was ways of making him be sent to time out, as I was. He opened the closet door and pointed to the top shelf. After rolling my eyes, as I still do, and looking up my heart skipped a beat. I will never forget the pattern of the wrapping paper. Bright red and forest green diagonal lines. “Alex, how did you put those there?” I asked. “I didn’t, those are ours for next week”. But how could our presents already be here? I didn’t leave milk or cookies by the table and I had Just been put on timeout, so I was most certainly in the naughty list. I had not finished my letter! There was no way Santa or anyone knew what I wanted. Alex also must have also forgotten I’d met Santa at the mall! As I thought of every piece of evidence of Santa in my mind it hit me, BOOM! The reason Alex had been so nonchalant about Santa’s list suddenly made sense: he’d been planning this. 

He’d done this before. It was no different than a few months before, when he told me not to tell mom about my tooth falling, he wanted me to see that the tooth fairy was not real. Mom had to explain, as I swallowed tears, that the tooth fairy had days off, just like her over the weekends and just like Santa over the summer. Alex wanted me to cry like I did with the tooth fairy lie, but I was older this time, he could not fool me, and he had to be stopped. 

When I told grandma what Alex had said to me, she sent him to time out and told Alex he was on the naughty list and Alex was really upset. Why would Alex be upset about the naughty list if he did not believe in Santa?! He wanted me to feel bad and he had gotten what he deserved: time out until mom picked us up at 5:00pm, and fear of coal for Christmas.